It’s not me, it’s you

This is when “It’s not you, it’s me” seems appropriate.
This is when “I like you but I’m in love with someone else” seem fit. 

I’m in love with the one who got away. I’m in love with someone who lives 6557 miles away and I haven’t talk to for over a year. 

He was my 2016 summer fling. He was my 24/7 for a short while… Losing him was the reason I came back to my ex (which was the worst decision I’ve made). He was the reason why I still keep my Snapchat even though I don’t open it anymore. 

He’s the reason why even though I like you, I can’t follow through. He’s the reason why I’m not yet ready. He’s the promise I’m trying to keep… that I will only get into a relationship if the feeling is as intense as what I felt for him. 

But you… you let me down. You gave up the moment I didn’t give in. You held my hand when you thought you’d have me but let go when you realized you won’t. You left me when I needed a friend because you don’t understand how I felt. And just like that, you broke my heart… just like how everyone else did. 

You only cared about how you felt and ignored why current state… you’re drowning in this society’s selfish ways… and maybe, just maybe… you’d only care if you receive your tape with the story of how you broke me. 

So yeah, I did like you… but I came to realize where I got it wrong… It’s not me, it’s you. 
Photo by Hsin Wang

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